Hey Y'all,
Well it's been QUITE some time since I last wrote here. It came to the point where my thoughts were my own private thoughts and I didn't really feel like sharing it with anyone, but here I am, back in the swing of LJ. Wooooo!

Sooooo where to begin? I'm back home living in Grand Falls-Windsor. I came home at the beginning of June to work at my trailer park! My fourth summer there! It was great. I love that job. We definitely could have had a nicer August month though.

I guess as many of you already know, I decided against going to MSVU for the Hospitality Tourism Management thing, because after working at the Battery Hotel, I quickly changed my mind on that career choice! Haha. I know what you're all thinking... I am the queen of indecisive! And you're right... but there are a lot of factors that have contribute to that indecisiveness!

So anyways, now, I'm currently working at Aliant (in the Source by Circuit City). I haven't had a whole lot of hours yet, but I'm hoping things will pick up soon. Otherwise, I'm going to have to find something else. Job hunting has to be my least favorite thing.

So I know, you're ALL wondering... "Patick?" Patrick ended things with me rather abruptly over the summer. I will not go into details because to be honest, its not something I wish to share. Though nearly 4 years is a hard thing to get over, I know that things are for the better. The last 6 months or so, were not the fairy tale everyone thought them to be, BUT, its time for me to concentrate on ME now. There are so many things that I want to do now. I would have liked to have shared them with Patrick, but I guess that just means he misses out.

I'm working on deciding upon my career... AGAIN! My latest thought, is architectural drafting. I'm sure I may have mentioned that somewhere along the line before because I've thought about it before. This time, I'm hoping to follow through with it. I just need to do some research for schools and whatnot.

This has been a summer of new beginnings for me, and I'm going to make things right for me. I'm going to get back to the core of who I am as an individual, not as a couple. It's a scary thought, but an exhillerating one. I no longer have to make decisions with someone else in mind, I can go where I want, do as I please and just have a good time... and I plan to do just that.

Anyways, I guess thats about enough of an update as I'm energetic enough to give! Haha! I hope all is well with everyone! You all take care!

Peace and Love!

Dee

Hi there,
I don't really have a whole lot to write about tonight, but for some reason I wanted to write. I'm kind of hyper, which I haven't been in a VERY long time! You know what I miss... having lots of friends to hang out with. I guess that just comes with growing up and moving away from home you know. Leaving everyone back there in Grand Falls, or everyone else is gone off to wherever. Its sad really, cause I used to LOVE hanging with large groups of people. I had (as Andrew Benson used to call it) a "posse". And it's not that I want to have a large group of friends, just a select few that I can hang with and whatever on a fairly regualr basis. I think that if I can save enough money in the next 2 months or so, I'm gonna buy myself a little car, and then I can go visit the friends I have in here on a more regular basis, and I won't have to worry about the DAMN METROBUS >:( GRRRRR!!!!

Have I mentioned how the Metrobus is the bane of my existence?? Oh well it is... and I one day, will destroy them all! Actually, I must say, last night, the bus driver was the sweetest man ever. I had to tell him when he let me off at my stop, that he has to be the nicest bus driver with Metrobus. I know I know. I'm a huge dork, but hey, what's the good in thinking something nice about someone and not actually telling them! Its very much wasted energy and you never know, that person may be having a horrible day, and just a nice little compliment could make their entire day!

I'm still on my quest for life choices. I still have no idea what I want to do with my life. I just want to have fun for a few years to be completely honest. I haven't had a whole lot of fun lately, and I want to! I've been incredibly bored. So when I save up enough money for a car, I'm gonna buy it, and do LOTS of fun stuff with it on the weekends and stuff!! Oh yeah! Road Trips baby! I LOVE road trips! I've had the most fun in my life during road trips with Shane or the youth group.

God I miss Shane. I guess he'll soon be back from Israel. I really hope to talk to him soon. I haven't heard from him in nearly a year, and I miss him deeply. Of all my old friends, he's the one that tears my heart open when I think that he's not in my life anymore. I know that I may have mentioned that before, but I guess it's just cause he's very often on my mind. It's rare that he doesn't cross my mind at some point during the run of a day. Something stupid we did together, or something hilarious he did or said. I love that guy. I miss him so much.

Anyways, so much for not having a whole lot to write about. I guess it's not really about anything in particular, just a bunch of random thoughts, which are probably incoherent and boring, in which case I apologize to the readers! haha. Well I guess that's about all from me for now! Until Next Time.... PEACE!

MUAH!!

Love Dee

I like to pretend I've been busy and haven't been able to write here lately, but that isn't true. I like to pretend I have a life outside this damn computer, but that isn't true either. I like to pretend I have a plan for my future, but nothing could be farther from the truth. I like to pretend that my life isn't F*ed up, simply because it makes me feel better... but the truth be told, I seriously think I need counseling; life counseling, career counseling, the whole damn works!

I feel that if I pretend long enough, I will eventually convince myself of these things... even if no one else believes me. Hahaha!! Oh me, I must laugh at myself because otherwise I think I will crack...

I want to get away. Go to somewhere warm, and just relax on the beach beneath a clear blue sky, and hear the waves rolling in, and the birds, and the wind blowing the trees... ahhh... I wish I had money, and a car, not that a car would get me to some exotic beach, but you know! Oh I'd be sooo out of here!

I'm sure this is an incredibly boring entry, but if so, why the hell are you still reading?

I have very spurratic/sparatic (I really need to learn how to spell that word) thoughts tonight. I don't know why. I feel my brain is gone to mush. I had a migraine last night, and 4 Extra Strength Tylenol and 2 Gravol later, I feel a little better. I still have a little headache, but nothing in comparison to last night. Migraines are terrible; nausea combined with the worst possible headache imaginable... not a nice feeling at all! I hate migraines.

You know what else I hate? Laundry. Ugh! Laundry is so annoying! Especially when it takes at LEAST twice as long to dry your clothes as it does to wash it, so you're like ALL day drying clothes! Sooo annoying. I've spent the whole day cleaning and doing laundry, and still at 12:20AM I'm waiting on a load of clothes to finish drying in the dryer... arg!

Anyways, I guess thats all for now. I'm tired and need some rest. Tomorrow is WalMart and cleaning the rest of the house before Marie returns from Africa! So until next time... Peace! MUAH!!

Love Dee

I just looked it up on Dictionary.com: Its "Sporadic"! Who would have known!!??

I know I know, it's been forever since I've written here. I've actually been busy! Haha! Quite the change for me, I know. I've been working at The Battery Hotel & Suites for the past 2 weeks and its been going really well. I had applied to work there when I found out about my acceptance to MSVU for Hospitality & Tourism, and was quite happy when I got a call for an interview and even happier when I got the job. However, as things always go with me, now comes time for the second thoughts, the doubts, the uncertainty... about school, not the job.

Since I've been working at the hotel, I've had the opportunity to observe the people around me and the type of work they do, and since this is what I'm planning on attending 4 years of university for, I figure I should have some idea what I'm in for. In my observation however, I've realized that this may not be the best decision for me after all. I watch the manager of the hotel, and she sits in her office all day, doing paper work and boring office stuff, with no interaction with the public whatsoever, with the exception of dealing with bitchy customers that the front desk clerks can't deal with. I really don't know if thats what I want to do. I need to be interacting with people, and non-bitchy people in general. I realize that there's going to be at least one bitchy person for every ten I interact with, but that I can handle. When it's only the one in ten that I get the opportunity to interact with... uh... I don't know about that.

In all honesty, I know what I want... I want to be a performing musician. That's what I want more than anything else. I wish I were brave enough to follow Michelle Branch's plan before she got famous: "I never had a back-up plan because it only gave me a reason to fail". However, I'm not brave enough for that. My friend Michelle (Robertson, not Branch, haha) told me that instead of going to school for 4 years to do something I'm not sure I want to do, why not take the next 4 years and work on my music, which is something I KNOW I want to do. Then after that, if I still haven't gotten really far with music, THEN, I can see what else is out there for me. It's not a bad idea, but by that time, I'll be 26, and I'll have to go back to school until I'm 30 possibly. Lord, that's a long time. See, I'm not sure if I'm willing to do that. I WANT to, but I'm just so scared. If I were to decide to do that, I'd need a definite plan. If I go to Halifax, I'm gonna get my friend Christian to be my music manager, cause he'd do an amazing job. He's a go-getter and I totally trust him to put my best interests first. He'd definitely get me out there performing and whatnot. So you know, maybe Michelle's idea is not that far off. Maybe I won't take 4 years, but 1 or 2 couldn't hurt right? I don't know, but I'll have to do some more thinking about it.

So anyways, I think thats probably all I have to write for now.

Until next time... PEACE!

Love Dee

Hey Everyone,
Got some really great news yesterday! I've been accepted to Mount Saint Vincent University to do my bachelors in Tourism & Hospitality Management. Yay for me! I may as well congratulate myself because praise from other sources seems to be VERY limited these days! I'm super excited about it all. I cannot wait to go. I hope and pray that Patrick will go with me, but if not, we're gonna make it work somehow.

I have some other things I need to take care of. I have to rewrite a cover letter for my resume. I'm going out on monday to deliver some resumes to hotels to see if I can get some experience prior to my studies at MSVU and ALSO to get some much needed cashola! I'm soooo poor!! So yeah, that, and also, I need to send back a tuition down-payment to confirm that I'll be accepting my admittance! Then, I need to decide upon my living situation! I need to figure out if I want to live in Residence or if I'm going to get an apartment (Patrick's decision to go or not is a huge part of this). I also have to call and talk to someone about the courses I'm supposed to register for (University is scarrrrry).

But yeah, anyways, I'm on my own now. I feel as though I'm all alone on this one. The lack of support about decisions I make in life is overwhelming. It's a horrible feeling you know, to think that the people who are supposed to be supportive in your life are the absolute discouragers! But whatever right? Here comes my New Years Resolution thing: DOING THINGS BECAUSE I WANT TO, REGARDLESS OF WHAT OTHERS SAY, THINK OR DO!

So, look out world, here I come! In spite of all the negativity surrounding me, the lack of support and understanding, I'm going to take this world by the balls and have it eating out of the palm of my hand before no time. I cannot wait, to embark on the next journey in my life, I am competent, confident, and determined! Screw all of you who don't believe in me, screw each and every one of you. Revenge is best served on a cold platter... and god damn, you don't know how cold it can get.

Peace!

Love Dee

Hey All,
I'm so glad I got this new laptop cause what the hell else would I be doing during this CRAPPY weather!!! Ugh. It's NASTY outside. Again, I don't really know what to write. I was at Patrick's place last night and we watched Wedding Crashers. It was a pretty great movie. Super funny. I love Vince Vaughn, but even more than that, I LOVE LOVE LOVE Rachel McAdams. She is such a beautiful, talented, not to mention Canadian actress. She's SUPER!

You Passed 8th Grade Math

Congratulations, you got 9/10 correct!

YAY!! I can pass 8th Grad Math!! Lol.. yes I'm really bored!! Okay.. I'm outtie for now. PEACE!

Love Dee

Hey All,
I'm really glad that you guys wrote to let me know I'm not writing to no one. That would be kind of lame. Haha. So yeah, I guess I have been re-inspired shall we say. I love my pretty pink layout because I'm a geek like that. So anyways, I guess I should fill you in on whats been happening since my last real post.

First of all, I have applied to do my Bachelor of Hospitality & Tourism Management at Mount Saint Vincent University in Halifax for those of you who I haven't told already. I'm pretty excited about it. I finally have some sort of direction in my life... Of course the wait is on now to hear if I'm accepted or not, but I feel pretty good about it. I think it would be something I'd really enjoy. I loved my job at Sanger Park during the past 3 summers and I love meeting people. Perhaps I'd get to go to some exotic place and run a swanky hotel! Haha! That would be awesome! So yeah, I just have to wait and see.

I still want music in my life of course, but things just aren't seeming to work out in that department right now. Patrick and I have been trying so hard to get a band together here in St. John's but it's just not going well. Patrick is trying to decide if going to Halifax with me is something he wants to do or not, but I think if he does, we could do things musically there as well. I really want him to go, but I want it to be his decision so I'm leaving it all in his hands. I'm sure it'll all work out, as they always do.

In the hype of New Years, I went crazy on my resolution making... thus far I haven't really been all that great at following them...
*no eating take out... LOL.. yeah right, that lasted long
*getting a job... I've been trying, I swear
*getting up early to start my days... ummm... yes...
*stop swearing... I'm trying really hard not to sound like a sailor I promise!!
And so many more, but I will say that one that I have kept is trying to be a better all around person. I've mended relationships in my life that have gone astray and I feel much better about it. Perhaps I overreact with things, but I couldn't seem to shake my negative feelings (I guess that's just in my genetic makeup). Anyways, one of my dearest friends and I are back to the way we were now and I love her to pieces.

**I do love you Kritter... sorry I had to be so incredibly stupid at times.**

Another of my old friends that I have lost touch with I found through the internet, and we chat on a fairly regular basis. It's great to hear from a friend you haven't heard from in about 7 years. It's wonderful. Makes you feel all warm and tingly inside. LOL. I know I'm a dork.

Another of my resolutions was to do things for ME, and not worry about what anyone else has to say about it. This is a HARD one when support in my life is very limited. But I'm doing this, if it kills me I'm going to do it! Hence the MSVU thing. I'm doing it for me, in spite of the negativity I get for it. In the great words of Natalie, "screw the world and everyone in it". One of the greatest lessons I've ever learned in my life was to do things to make ME happy, because without MY happiness, I'd be no use to anyone else. So to all of you who are PEOPLE PLEASERS, follow this lesson, it will change your life.

Anyways, I think that's all for now. (I can hear you all saying "its about time!!") Until Next time, PEACE OUT!

MUAH!

Love Dee

HEY!!!!!!!!!
So I know it's been quite a while since I last WROTE here, but I'm kinda bored today and I decided that while I'm waiting for Laundry, I wanted to make my LJ all nice and purdy! And it has reinspired me to write here (for how long I'm not sure, but for the time being anyways).
This is only gonna be a short entry, but I want to know who actually reads this. Leave me a comment, just so I know you're out there reading! OKeeeeee?? Thanks! Muah!

Love Dee

Hi there,
Well.. 5 more days and I'll be flying back home to Newfoundland... sigh... ahh.. good old Newfoundland! I can't say I'm sad about leaving here. It's been really fun, but I'm ready to come home now. As sappy and sooky as it sounds, I miss my mom. I miss Patrick too, but unfortunately I probably wont get to see Patrick at all this summer because we'll both be working. It's pretty poopy.
I just thought I'd post up some lyric excerpts from a song that I've been listening to a lot lately... it's called "Home" by Michael Buble.

"Another summer day, Has come and gone away, In Paris and Rome, But I wanna go home
Maybe surrounded by, A million people I Still feel all alone, I just wanna go home, Oh I miss you, you know
Another aeroplane, Another sunny place, I’m lucky I know, But I wanna go home, I’ve got to go home
Let me go home, I’m just too far from where you are, I wanna come home
Let me go home, I’ve had my run, Baby, I’m done, I gotta go home
Let me go home, It will all right, I’ll be home tonight, I’m coming back home"

Sigh... I really wish I were home right now. I feel like I'm at the end of the world here! Haha! I am at the other side of the continent I guess! That's close enough. It's been a great experience for me up here... I've learned a lot and I'm really glad I came... but 6 weeks is a long time here without a car or anything else useful in an escape.

Yesterday was pretty cool though. We went to the Hot Springs up in a place called Ainsworth, it was really cold and rainy outside, and we were out in this pool... it was awesome! But it was really neat. I think if we had the opportunity to do more of that, site seeing and whatnot, I wouldn't have gotten so bored and home sick. But anyways, all in good time... 5 days... and I'll be home! YAY! See you all soon!

Love ME!

Hi there,
Well I'm in the laundromat in Nelson BC and I have not much else to do. I've been having a pretty cool time here in BC. The first week we were here we went on tour with the college and we had a really great time. The second week we started classes (learning about Midi in ProTools) and we were rehearsing for a show of our own (the Newfies as we're so aptly called..lol) which we actually did last night. That went pretty good as well. So all is good. The only thing that sucks is that I rarely have time to be on the net without having to pay for it. So, with that said, I'll have to write in detail when I get home. Until next time... See you all in Newfoundland in 3 weeks!

Love Me